014- It is today.......


I swear to God, it is only yesterday that we celebrated our freedom as PMR students! Marking that we already crossed the finish line... And today, they will announce the result... 


Seriously, Im gonna shit myself, no joke. Scratch when I said it felt like yesterday we finished our last paper, it feels like only yesterday that I received my UPSR slip. And I fucking flunk it. Which makes me even more scared that I will flunk this one too... God, help.. 

And Ebi, Happy birthday you little shit ッWe will celebrate later, together with my result! *finger crossed 


UPDATE: Well, everything went well. My family and I even had breakfast together, like we normally would during holidays. I even met Khira and her family during our breakie. Dungun is indeed one small small town. As for the result, all I can say is Alhamdulillah. Didnt manage to get straight As but I dont really regret any. I took 9 subjects and I still cant manage to get A for Islamic Studies and ofcourse- Arab. -__- Whats new. Btw, thanks for all the kind words. Meant the world for me..! Have a great holiday guys! Now I can enjoy mine to the blast!

013- Bazookaa...!


Today, my friends and I just have soooooooooooo much free time that we came out with this...


You know what we say if we dont submit our homeworks on time? "We dont have time.. a lot to do.. blablabla.." and you know what we said if someone asked why we did this..? "We just have so much time to kill.. cantek kan?" fak. 

By the way, I totally hate the MAMP guy. He's our senior by two years. He hit me with a water balloon (which is so huge btw I called it bazooka) and I WAS SOAKING WET!! 



I dont hate him for that. I hate him because he has the decency of asking me "Did I hit it?", which I quote "Kena dok lagiii?" and I swear I can see his eyes sparkling with excitement while asking me that. That, ladies and gentlemen is why I hate him. 

till then!


012- Atukmak sakit


Banyak sangat masalah yang perlu gua pikirin. Huha. Indon bossss.Tapi yang major dia *major eh?* is atukmak aku sakit. Bukan sakit biasa lorh. Kalau biasa tak pulak aku heran sangat. Grandparents aku bukan macam grandparents orang lain. Mine suka tour. Bukan lepak bace surat khabar minum kopi jahit baju. No. So hari tu diorang pegi jalan dekat Jordan. They took a visit to Palestin. Lepas keluar dari Palestin, dia demam-demam. Tapi atukayah aku just ignore je la. "Biasalah orang tua batuk-batuk". Then esoknya naik bas, DUMMMMMM ! atukmak pengsan dalam bas. Kelam kabut laa semua orang . Then bawak pergi kat hospital kat Jordan .



Sampai kat sana, terus kene tahan ICU Intensive Care of Unit . Bila tanye doctor in charge dia kata atukmak disahkan dapat Pneumonia atau bahase kita, Paru-paru berair. Mama kate tak ramai yang mati sebab Pneumonia tapi penyakit ni dicop agak merbahaya. Boleh bawak mati. =.= Keling kann?


Atukmak ngan atukayah terlepas flight. Babah *ayah aku* bayarkan balik flight diorang. Then lepas lima hari kene tahan, atukmak degil nak balik Malaysia jugak. Even dia tak sihat mane. Expert doctors pun tak bagi sebenarnye atukmak balik. Tapi dia tetap nak balik.


Then flight di tempah. Diorang balik. Sampai Malaysia, atukmak nampak okay. Then beransur teruk. Makin lame makin teruk. Last-last dah takboleh kawal diri sangat, dia dihantar ke Hospital Pusrawi, Kuala Lumpur.


Hopefully , atukmak cepat sihat ya.. Belum ada mase lagi nak ziarah. Takziah untuk diri sendiri jugak. PMR dah nak dekat masih belum ada kesedaran diri... =(


011- Happy 1 year!



Kali ni aku nak update pasal kawan aku yang gilacrazybangangtaktentuhalabengongdanasdfghjkl dengan pakwe dia. Haha . Kinda entry ni aku tuju kat dia ngan pakwe dia. Yang tak suke ngan relationship diorang boleh get lost angkat kaki. 

Khira, 

Ingat kan masa first time aku teman mu date? Mu dua ekor date kat tempat paling romatik kat sekolah. Hehe parking bas. Mase first mu ngan Amir nok kenal satu same lain, aku laaa jadi orang ketiga. Haha thats mean tu tahun lepas. Setahun dulu. Nak bagi pendrive la ape la. And dia bagi kertas A4 tulis I Love U guna highlighter. Warna kuning. Haha mase tu beliau takde bajet. Memory tu aku akan ingat sampai bila-bila. Kalau mu dua orang kawen, aku dengan bangganya boleh cerita kat cucu aku yang nenek dia jadi penghalang zina mu dua orang. Hahah ! Okay start berbolok. 



Ingat lagi time mu pening kepale nak fikirkan hadiah birthdah Amir 2012? Haha come on, takkan lupa. Aku, mu ngan Rahimah gi keluar bandar carik album untuk Amir. Dari PSI, sampai Aneka, jalan kaki. Punyalah nak tolong kawan tu.. Haha. Then, bilik bersepahhhh dengan kertas colour and sampah sarap. Sanggup laa berjemur nak ambek gambar. Sanggup laa berdiri atas katil nak shoot. Haha. Gile kan ? Album tu satu kejayaan terbesar dalam hidup aku. Hehe even bukan untuk aku, tapi aku rase terharu gila. Kalau je aku Amir, aku nangis kottt . Haha. Sacrifices dua orang kawan tolong kawan dia buat hadiah untuk pakwe die =.= . 


Ingat lagi time terawih and aku bawak semua benda yang mu nak aku print tu? Haha. Semua untuk Amir. Aku tak buat ni semua untuk Amir okay. Aku buat untuk mu. Haha. Sanggup laa bawak kertas tu dalam plastik. Kes macam seludup dadah je. Then taknak bagi orang tahu, letak bawah sejadah tak boleh blah. Haha. Gila. Sangat gila . 


Wish aku, aku tak nak banyak. Dengan sape pun mu couple, asalkan mu bahagia, aku ikut je. Even awal-awal aku tak setuju sangat bila dapat tahu mu ngan Amir. Sangat tak setuju. Aku takut mu sedih. Dulu kan Amir player. Hehe. Tapi lama-lama, aku rasa, Amir ngan mu tu okay je. Selagi mu happy, aku okay ja.


Khira, aku ada ngan mu through thick and thin HAHA ok .. 


Amir, aku harap mu boleh bawak Khira sampai ke pelamin ye, Mer? Aku nok sangat tengok mu dua orang. =D Aku nok cerite ke cucu aku senang. Hahaha. 


Guys, take care of your relationship. Sincerely...


010- It was me.. Im sorry...


3 September - Isnin
Aku dapat pergi Kem Cakne Arab and Pai and for today, subject BA. Haha best gile kem tu. Happening je. Dah lah dapat duduk ngan kawan-kawan. Eventhough sedih jugak sebab dia pisahkan aku dengan kawan-kawan aku yang lain, it doesnt matter laa. At least aku dapat kenal Nor ngan Aziey lagi rapat. Have a great day !


4 September - Selasa
Subject PAI and its damn boring. Tuhan je tahu ape aku rase duduk kat PPD tu. Dah lah takdek kawan. Kawan-kawan aku semua pandai-pandai. Tak layak pergi kem PAI gitu. Dahlah AKRAM yang datang tu tua-tua semuanya. Boring sangattt. Nor kate "Ade hikmah" Haha. Now I know.

Petang tu dapat mesej dari Khira. Senarai name orang yang dapat pergi Kem Negeri dekat Mayang Sari. Unfortunately, name aku takde. Aku tanye balik Khira "Aku?" and the answer is memang aku tak layak pergi. Aku just tengok Ain yang duduk tepi aku and air mata aku bertakung. Aku nak pergi kem tu! Kawan-kawan aku dapat pergi! Kenape aku takk. Then Ain tanye aku, "Kenape?" Then aku just dapat cakap "Saya tak dapat pergi Kem Negeri" Serentak, air mate aku jatuh dalam kem tu jugak.. Orang kat depan tengah berleter pasal Agama Islam and aku hanyut dengan emosi aku. Aku nak pergi sangat kem tuu. Nak sangat. Takde sape dapat bayangkan macam mane naknye aku pergi kem tu. Result ikut Mid year. Aku dapat 6 A 2 B 1 C. C tu kott jadi penghalang aku .. Aku nak pergi ..

Seharian aku set kan otak aku yang kem tu just brings me more harm. Haha. Yeah untuk sedap kan hati aku. Then okay. Forget about the tears. Enjoy life back. Even dalam hati .......



5 September - Rabu
Sayu je bila dengar pasal geng-geng ni kemas barang nak pergi Kem.. Lagi sayu bila tengok diorang balik pukul 12:30 . Nak lambai pun tak sampai hati. Then diorang datang balik pukul 2:30 nak naik bas. Aku, Idayu, Rahimah ngan Aliyn tak bagitahu pun Ustaz nak tengok diorang. Kire macam skip kelas laa nak jumpe diorang. Then bila diorang naik bas, rase jugak nak nangis. Tapi tahan je la. Smileeeeee ^^. Then bas gerak. Sumpah wehh, rase terpukul gile. Then dapat tahu memang Ustaz batalkan kelas for that day. Siap-siap nak balik rumah dah.. Malam tu aku nak bercerite ngan Khira. Tapi diorang buzy sampai pukul 11 lebih. Okay aku faham. Then aku tunggu sampai pukul 11 lebih dapat mesej dari dia, "call lah" Then aku call, tak angkat. Aku faham. Urgent. Yeah. Aku pun tidur laa.


6 September - Khamis
Kelas aku jadi macam kelas berhantu. Dari 25 orang, tinggal 14 orang je. Cikgu-cikgu pun takdek semangat nak ajar kitorang. Hermmm kinda boring tapi kitorang buat-buat buzy dengan soalan-soalan trial. Try to live on our own feet. Boringgg sangat takde sape tahu. Alah keep remind myself, alahhh nanti diorang balik laa weh. Sabtu ni diorang ade laa balik. Semuanya jadi macam dulu balik. Okayyy ?



8 September - Sabtu
Diorang balik hari ni! Yessssssss .. Ouhh finally aku dah takdek laa boringg sangatt! Bas bertolak amek diorang and diorang pun balik. Tapi diorang tak singgah pun kelas. Diorang turun bas and balik je. Alah takpe, penat. Okay aku faham. Malam tuu twitter penuh pasal memory dekat sane.. Aku jealous okay. Thats explain everything. Diorang tweet pasal memory kat sane. Pasal jadual, pasal bilik, pasal hang kat pantai and everything about that camp..

So aku cam marah2 laa bile diorang cakap pasal kem tu. TL aku penuhh . Last2, Farhana tegur "Ape yang aku dok puas hati dengan orang yang gi Kem? " Guys, aku bukan dok puas hati dengan orang yang pergi kem. Aku cuma tak berape nak suke bile korang start cerita pasal kem tu. Korang nak aku rase ape yang korang rase kan? Tapi korang duduk tak dalam tempat aku? Dari Kem Cakne, aku tak rapat ngan kawan2 aku.

Aku sayang kawan lebih dari orang pernah tahu. And ape yang aku harapkan just diorang lebih bertimbang rase. Tu je. Aku tak benci kawan-kawan aku. Aku minta maaf pasal harsh words yang aku cakap kat Twitter.


Aku tahu aku tak patut emo malam tu. Just aku tak dapat control anger aku . Aku betul2 mintak maaf. Malam tu aku call Idayu and aku cerita semuaa. And aku nangis. Aku tahu aku hilang kawan-kawan aku sebab aku. Aku dah tak tahu nak buat ape. Malam tu, tak best mane..

Hari ni aku nak lepas semua yang ade. Haha insyaAllah takde maki hamun. I want to make this thing clear. About the camp. About friendship. Everything. Yeahh aku tahu memang aku salah, aku maki hamun diorang dekat Twitter sesedap mulut aku. Aku dah tak tahu nak kene buat ape. V.V

Awak, saya tak tahu ape status saye ngan awak sekarang. Dulu kite kawan baik, lepas dari bende ni semua jadi, saye still kawan awak ke? Saye rindu sangat time kite makan roti kaya penyek bawah pokok tu. Time awak cerite semua dekat saye. Saye nak jadi macam tu balik tapi saye tahu takkan jadi kan. Lagipun awak dah ade die. Saye yakin die tak akan buat bende macam saye buat. Awak cerite laa semua dekat die, InsyaAllah die faham. Saye taknak awak ade kawan bangang macam saye. However, kenangan saye jadi kawan baik awak, saye akan cerite kan kat cucu saye so that diorang tahu, ade kawan macam awak is one of the best memory of existence. Awak kawan saye, selamenye.

Okay thats all.


009- Happy 15th Birthday, Dear Self





Okay first of all, give me a break! I want to celebrate my 15th birthday AND IT IS SUPER AWESOME! We managed to celebrate my birthday at school! With my friends! One fact tho- this is out PMR year. And there is no guarantee that all of us will stick at our school for another year. Me myself, might not be taking Arabs anymore next year, that is for shorrr. So it really does mean a lot to me. 

My friends even managed to make cute montage of video for my birthday celebration. It is havoc and happening and a lot happened in one day. I really hope my grown up self will read this and still remember everything about today. 

Thank you gais! *lap air mata... 



008- Respect. Earned.


Pss- another malay post.

Grrr --. Aku geram duh hari ni. Geram sangat. And satu lagi, entry ni memang nak tujukan kat someone and kalau sape-sape rase yang entry kali ni tak syok nak bace, korang boleh tekan pangkah kat atas tu dengan segala hormatnya. Aku bukan jenis yang kejar followers nor readers nowadays. Suke, sile bace, tak suke, angkat kaki. Simple as that. 

Dekat sekolah aku yang gah dan aku bangga denganya tu terkenal dengan kebitaraan Math and Chess. Tapi its pretty embarrassing bila result midyear exam untuk PMR candidates keluar, ade sorang member ni dapat E Math. E! E Fail! Name die Emma. Emma aku rase budak pandai tapi entah kenape boleh slack ngan Math. Kalau tak silap aku dapat 27% or something. Kinda laa. 

Pastu my science teacher is the head programs of PMR. Bila result keluar, terkejut laaa dia. Pastu dia pun tanya "Kelas awak yang score markah tinggi-tinggi ni taknak ke tolong dia dari E ni? Malas sangat nak zakat tenaga, nak zakat ilmu dekat kawan-kawan kan? " Okay dia cakap dalam loghat Terengganu aa tapi dalam bahasa ki il gitu ler bunyik nye. 

Bukan sekali aje Cikgu Nor cakap pasal Emma tapi almost all of the time. Nak suruhnya ade kesedaran dalam diri orang lain, tolong kawan yang susah. Mula-mula aku just diamkan je. Lame-lame timbul jugak ler keinsafan nak tolong kawan sesame PMR even dia bukan sealiran ngan aku. Aku Arab, dia Jepun. 

Mula-mula aku nak tanye tu, aku ade jugak terfikir, boleh jadi ke? Dah lah dia kinda berpengaruh. Pastu aku pun cakap kat diri sendiri. "Nia, you will have a great satisfaction kalau dia dapat result trial Math dia B. You can do this Nia." Then aku pun tanye laa that Emma kalau-kalau ade yang aku boleh tolong. 

Lame chat ngan dia, kitorang pun buat deal, hari ni, jumpe kat kelas aku so that boleh bincang ape-ape yang dia tak faham pasal Math. Well, bukan nak berbangga tapi result math aku jauhhh sangat nak banding ngan dia. Set! Pukul 2:40 sampai pukul 3:30 kat kelas aku. 

Harini, sepatutnya discussion Math tu kan. Aku tunggu and tunggu and tunggu sampai pukul 3. Dia tak datang-datang. Aku assume dia memang tak boleh datang, ade hal urgent or something. So aku ngan Idayu pun kemas-kemas barang nak balik. Mase aku ngan Idayu sampai kat main gate sekolah, aku pun nampak laa dia bersidai kat tepi jalan ngan member-member dia. 

"bangang" antara perkataan yang bermain dalam otak aku mase tu. Dia tengah cakap ngan sepupu dia, entah hape name mamat tu sambil sengih sengih. Then bila nampak aku lalu tu, dia pun laung. "Nia, sorry. Ce mari jap." Then dia pun bagitahu dia takboleh berguru ngan aku sebab dia tak sebulu ngan member-member aku yang lain. 


Serious, I mean, What The FUCK laa Emma. Aku tunggu dekat-dekat nak setengah jam and yang kau boleh cakap cume kau tak sebulu ngan member aku? Fain. FINE. Aku terima alasan dia. Aku dah tak tahu nak buat ape mase tu. So again, senyum je laa kan?  Kalau buat muke masam, orang kate sombong. So aku kate aa "Suke hati mu laa. " Then aku chow ngan Idayu. 

Cikgu, saya dah try nak ajar dia. Tapi dia memang kurang ajar duh. Saya tak tahu nak kena buat ape. Cikgu, saya dah ikut ape yang cikgu nak. Tapi saya tak mampu. Lepas ni kan cikgu, jangan laa nak suruh saya atau kawan-kawan saya yang lain ajarkan dia Math. Dia kan anak orang kaya? Dia boleh ikhtiar sendiri punye. Pandai-pandai laa dia fikir cara nak hidup, cikgu. Maafkan saya. 

I guess it is true what they say. You cannot help those who doesnt want to be helped. 



007- That day of the month...


I dont even know what is wrong with me today.. I just feel so... angry. so mad.. I just feel like an outcast. And cant even do anything right... And plus I just feel like cursing- at both anyone and anything... You know, one of those days that you just wanted to be left alone, but you need some companionship. Whom you can trust. Whom no matter what you do, or did, they just wont go away. No matter how hard you dissed them, pushing them away, they just stick with you. like the gum you stepped on at park. They stay because they know, deep deeep down, behind all those facade, you want them too. And because they feel like they need to. 



Okay now I just feel emotional-er. More than how mad I was. WHERE IS MY 'THEY'?! 

Maybe just near-birthday syndrome.. maybe some new fucked up hormone produced... 


006- It is worsening...


This was published today...

KUALA TERENGGANU: Seorang pelajar perempuan berusia 16 tahun telah menyimpan beg rakan sekelasnya untuk 17 jam tanpa menyedari di dalamnya terdapat mayat bayi yang baru dilahirkan.
Rakan sekelas itu telah diserahkan sebuah beg sejurus selepas rakannya melahirkan bayi perempuan di hostel sekolah berkenaan kira-kira pukul 1 pagi pada Selasa.
Doktor yang mendapat tahu mengenai kelahiran itu telah merawat gadis berkenaan di Hospital Sultanah Nur Zahirah di sini, apabila dia mengadu sakit perut.
“Satu pemeriksaan mengesahkan bahawa dia telah melahirkan bayi,” kata Ketua Jabatan Siasatan Jenayah Terengganu, Asisten Komisioner K. Manoharan pada Khamis.
“Pelajar perempuan itu memaklumkan bahawa dia menyimpan bayi itu di dalam beg sekolahnya.”
Doktor meminta pelajar itu untuk memanggil rakannya untuk membawa beg berkenaan ke hospital.
“Mereka menjumpai mayat bayi perempuan di dalam beg. Rakan pelajar itu mengalami trauma apabila difahamkan dia telah membawa beg yang mengandungi mayat seorang bayi,” kata Manoharan kepada pemberita.
Polis telah merampas gunting yang digunakan untuk memotong tali pusat bayi itu.
Manoharan berkata, bedah siasat menunjukkan bahawa bayi tersebut berjaya dilahirkan tetapi mempunyai kesan lebam di kepala dan terdapat air pada paru-parunya.
“Kami masih menyiasat punca kematian. Kes ini akan sedang disiasat atas sengaja menyebabkan kematian bayi,” kata beliau, sambil menambah pihak polis sedang mengesan bapa kepada bayi berkenaan atas tuduhan melakukan hubungan seks dengan perempuan bawah umur.

Heaven is waiting for the baby. As for the mother- you have been so strong, up until you manage to deliver the baby. You could've abortion but you chose to have the baby. And maybe you still do.. Maybe something happened and you changed your mind, or the baby died and you somehow afraid. Maybe you wanted to make things right, but wrong timing.. 

For the father, fuck you man. Seriously, even if you cried until heaven and hell merge, and still, fuck you. You took the pleasure, but you left when she was in trouble. You took her, without taking responsibilities. You plant your seed in her and what do you expect? Man. Fuck you. One day, you will have a family of your own, and you will reap what you sow. Hey you know what, you dont deserve a fucking family. You and your fucking dick can go rot and die. You dont deserve a daughter or a son, looking up for you. Because you already have a child looking down of you from heaven. 

If you guys wanna 'do it' and dont wanna buy the condom, let me know. I'll gladly buy it for you. Just dont have babies unless you both plan to keep it, you fucking moron.



005- My oh my..


"Jemah, mulut kau bau tungkik. Ketiak kau bau bangkai. Pergi mati je lah kau" ujar Zabedah berbisik lalu berlalu pergi mencari suami si Jemah. ehem



004- Sila...


Sila meninggal belajar. 

Kali ni entry dalam Malay. because... Im just so tired but wanting to rant still.. And you can see how good I am in my own mother tongue. Yes I need to use autocorrect for toungue. shit still wrong urgh



First, kerja sekolah aku banyak sangat. KHB, BM and so many others. Cikgu, kerja sekolah ini sangat sikit. Masih boleh kukira pakai jari ni. Tidak mahu menambahkan bebankah? Haha. Serious, if a single teacher can only teaches a single subject, how can the society think that a single student like me manage to handle 9 subjects? KQ pulak ade Ujian Lisan yang mane satu pun aku belum lulus lagi.. Ustaz Zaki dah banyak kali jeling huhu.. lek lu ustaz. Hafal pun belum. 

Second, SEDAP KENE GELAK ! Member aku gelakkan aku sampai keluar air mata aa tadi. Ummie "Ambek aa die nok sangat"! Ummie! Sejak bile entah dia jadi laser semacam lagi. Haha. Hari tu ngan S. Ummie Ummie. Makin hari makin sporting. Makin sporting makin annoying. Takpe guys.. Aku tak terase siket pun. I'm just waiting for the right moment untuk gelakkan korang balik.. HAHAHAHAHA ! *Entah bile nye tibe aku tak tahu. (.________.'') Dok aww starangg ~

Okay laaa. Katil dah panggil. Sia-sia jugak entry kali ni. Patut aku pergi study. But insteadddd... Haha. Same old same old. 

Okay till then! 



003- Changes. And change.


Changes as in 'change' to be someone else, someone better or even in some worse case, someone worse. In Islam, the term changes also be known as 'hijrah'. Some people always misunderstood the word Hijrah, and just said hijrah is common to word pindah(move). Like moving from one place to another. Thats hijrah as easy as that. But try to expand your scope to something bigger than just change your place of living. How about, changing the host you're living in. Changing yourself from bad to good, or from good to better!

Try to strive, to be better than who you are today. Or who you were yesterday. And try to always be better than the person you will become tomorrow. Thats how you hijrah. Thats how you strive for perfections. I know I know, people aren't perfect. But whats wrong of trying to be better? Whats wrong of trying to change the society you're currently living in? 

So today, I experienced some sort of thing that kinda pissed me off a bit. So as usual, we have to pray Zohor together (berjemaah) and to be honest, I dont really like the rule. I mean I have nothing against those who pray together yadiyadiyada. But me personally, I dont really like that. I mean, its 1:00 pm in the evening and we, students we sweat a lot and the smell it produces, HA! like bangkai you know. But, the rules said that even if you pray or not, you have to be there in the surau as well. And gosh I dont like that. I mean we the one who dont pray, we have no business in there. Just let us out, study in the library or what not. BUT NO. The ustazahs and the pengawas just want to keep us like dogs. 

Then came this one nosy ustazah whom I despise. Not hate, more just despise. like not really like. And she tergedek gedek came to me and just said out-loud "Nia, kenapa awak tak sembahyang? Saya tak pernah tengok awak sembahyang?" or rather the translation is "Nia, why are you not praying? I never saw you praying." 

And boy, I was so mad.

  • First, heyyyy! That is not right. I mean, its just Zohor and we were allowed to go home after 2pm and theres like 2 hours left for Asar. How do you know Im not praying? 
  • Second, why do you keep your eyes on me? There are other girls there, and you only noticed me the one who never pray? You either very like me or very dislike me. And Im pretty sure it is the latter.
  • Third, it is not fair to judge me from that one act. I always there during the solat hajat and bacaan yassin and what not. So its kinda unfair for you to say things like that. 



And, lastly, as for someone who was just trying to get myself into my Agama, how do you want me react with that kind of prejudice that you just gave to me? You honestly think I would just get my ass up and pray without having the slightest feeling of hatred in myself. Towards you. Yes, no wonder the others keep on viewing Islam as terrorist and hateful religion. Because of the actions that you did. How can you expect people to calmly accept the embarrassment you gave? And even fall in love with Islam even deeper? 


We always dream of changes, but sometimes we dont want to change ourselves firsthand. And even worse, in some cases, like this one, one is trying to change, and not knowing the struggle they have to face day by day, someone just came and easily threw that hateful prejudice shit to them. As the result, that one person dont wanna change anymore. It is a lot easier to remain the same, isnt it? 


002- Happy New Year!



Sooooo.... I waited until 12:06 am just to post this! Always wanted to celebrate New Year's Eve, but living in Terengganu simply means a big N-O. And today is Sunday, which means tomorrow I will start my school day after almost 2 months of break! And I will be in Form 3... ergo- PMR. F***. 


What did people do during NYE anyway..? I know there will be a lot of fireworks in Kuala Lumpur... but here..? We just spend the night watching Akademi Fantasia.. Well, my mom really loves those reality TV. But she never did Afundi anybody. So yeah, we just finished watching that, and kutuk kutuk those who cant sing. 


Now my whole house is dark- indicating everyone is asleep. Except me, because I have huge dedication of posting this! And I already have all of my school stuff prepared for tomorrow. It is nice going back to school and be around your friends again.. but not the school loads, the teachers and the requirements of being a perfect student. Boy can we just skip all of this and go directly to where I am having my time in my mansion... which has cool swimming pool and you can imagine me sunbathing by the pool... 


okay bai!