Is it my fault? Is it my fault that everything turns upside down like right now? If anyone else be in my shoes, confront with the problems and thoughts I have to handle, will they still manage to smile like the way I did? Even though it is so hurt that can crush all their heart, will they still laughed the way I did?
Anyone, takes my shoes! I beg youu! I'm just so tired. Too tired. Or is it just me who took it heavily? Maybe I should be like you. Take everything as a joke and never serious. If you can, why cant I? Or maybe be a tempered person when someone try to correct my wrongdoings? If you can, why cant I? Or maybe just let everyone else do your work and you just can have you beautiful sleep? If you can, why cant I? Or just give anyone a call saying that you cant make it to a meeting and makes the other feels like you dummies? If you can, why cant I? Or just trust the others agree with your action without arguing anything? If you can, why cant I? Or I can make up excuses, many of them to escape myself from doing a lot of works? If you can, why cant I?
Please laa. I can make things worse. Or maybe worst! If you can, why cant I? Reconsider every step you take, will you? Because as for me, everything that you do now, brings nothing but misery in my life. I dont give a fuck weather you came from Saudi Arabia and the other teachers care about you or what not. I dont care. I just really dont want to hurt your feeling. It isnt my style actually. But since you are toooo much over the line, I just cant help it. Heyy you hurt my feeling badly, If you can, why cant I? I dont also give a fuck weather each pupil in our school had crushed on you or whatever, because for me, I can see nothing but your whole bad side.
I had to clean 2kg of squids so that I can make it to our meeting this evening. 2kilogram! Thats the deal. And you? Why you cant make some effort, sweetie? I was soo disappointed.
Well, enjoy your life. Idup ambe. young, wild and free~ isnt it. If you can, why cant I?
